You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
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