i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize