So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
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Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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