no, he came in my armpit
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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