Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Bring me that man meat
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
