I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
