i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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