Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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