Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
