Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
