hell yes lets make some ravioli
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it