May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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