I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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