I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize