How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize