My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
