that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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