We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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