So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
