Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(504): View more from Louisiana

All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.

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(509): View more from Washington

I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.

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(954): View more from Florida

Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?

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(707): View more from California

I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(303): View more from Colorado

Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.

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(562): View more from California

Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night

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(503): View more from Oregon

Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children

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(518): View more from New York

He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.

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