Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
the liver wants what the liver wants
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Randomize
