i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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