He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Randomize