I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
