Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Randomize
