You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
