I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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