i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize