..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
