with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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