new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize