grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Randomize