he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize