I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Randomize
