clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
