She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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