i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
i out mim tonsoeep
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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