You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
