i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize