i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"