Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(940): View more from Texas

That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(940): That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone http://tfl.nu/w4ug

Replies (3) Good night (836) Bad night (1860)
Favorite
(734): View more from Michigan

Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(734): Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders. http://tfl.nu/udeu

Replies (32) Good night (954) Bad night (6299)
Favorite
(636): View more from Missouri

trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(636): trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites. http://tfl.nu/811n

Replies (10) Good night (5029) Bad night (855)
Favorite
(315): View more from New York

It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(315): It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities http://tfl.nu/tqmj

Replies (11) Good night (5243) Bad night (1631)
Favorite
(516): View more from New York

theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(516): theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again... http://tfl.nu/q6mz

Replies (15) Good night (1272) Bad night (3089)
Favorite
(818): View more from California

Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(818): Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right. http://tfl.nu/8nul

Replies (37) Good night (6176) Bad night (1592)
Favorite
(760): View more from California

The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(760): The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation http://tfl.nu/2mmn

Replies (9) Good night (1949) Bad night (1425)
Favorite
(812): View more from Indiana

You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(812): You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time. http://tfl.nu/0lxp

Replies (7) Good night (2887) Bad night (768)
Favorite
(604): View more from British Columbia

I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(604): I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag. http://tfl.nu/nwen

Replies (28) Good night (3188) Bad night (754)
Favorite
(614): View more from Ohio

Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(614): Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles. http://tfl.nu/gha2

Replies (10) Good night (2722) Bad night (742)
Favorite
(612): View more from Minnesota

And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(612): And the cockring thing wasn't sexual. http://tfl.nu/ceb9

Replies (19) Good night (430) Bad night (795)
Favorite
(562): View more from California

New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(562): New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches. http://tfl.nu/v2w2

Replies (9) Good night (902) Bad night (502)
Favorite
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(570): The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better. http://tfl.nu/cik5

Replies (4) Good night (768) Bad night (352)
Favorite
(269): View more from Michigan

Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(269): Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion. http://tfl.nu/gl41

Replies (8) Good night (832) Bad night (366)
Favorite
(702): View more from Nevada

Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(702): Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs. http://tfl.nu/8zsp

Replies (1) Good night (466) Bad night (422)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard