So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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