We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
