Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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