i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
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so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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