i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
