So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
