D3 body, D1 cock
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
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