Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
