I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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