Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
