god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.